Devonport Hash House Harriers: 1500

March 8, 2010

1500

Last week's run, combined the Lunar and D-Hash run at Thrust's house and went as expected; Everything was perfect. From the catering to the run, the company and the full moon, all went dreadfully well. But now, lets focus on today's big ticket item:

That is right, today is the 1500th run for the Devonport Hash House Harriers. Humble as we are this is not a big deal. But Lantern will be setting an extra special run for us, the good man he is, and all Hashers are cordially** invited to attend this special evening of debauchery* at the Lantern Inn: 168 Stoney Rise Road.

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Appendix:

The Mazada Standard 1500 Sedan at $2255 was Mazda's idea of "standard" was to give delusions of "luxury", offering plenty more than most other competitors of the time. Standard inventory included windscreen washers, reversing lights, and an advanced fresh air system.
1500 Gallery specializes in Brazilian photography, and is the first art gallery in the world with this explicit focus.
The first world record in the 1,500 m for men (athletics) was recognized by the International Amateur Athletics Federation, now known as the International Association of Athletics Federations, in 1912.
The Average Number of calories an adult requires in one day is 1500
The Number 1500 is the largest number to appear in the Torah as the value of a single word.\
The Number 1500 coincides with the value of the Greek phos (light) and God's explicit teaching that "the Torah is light" (Proverbs 6:23).

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* de·bauch·er·y

-bô

-r

)

n. pl. de·bauch·er·ies

a. Extreme indulgence in sensual pleasures; dissipation.

b. debaucheries Orgies.

2. Archaic Seduction from morality, allegiance, or duty.

____________________________________

** cor·dial

(kôr

adj.

1. Warm and sincere; friendly: a cordial greeting; cordial relations. See Synonyms at gracious.

2. Strongly felt; fervent: a cordial abhorrence of waste.

3. Serving to invigorate; stimulating.

1. A stimulant; a tonic.

2. A liqueur.

[Middle English, of the heart, from Medieval Latin cordilis, from Latin cor, cord-, heart; see kerd- in Indo-European roots.]

cor·diali·ty (-j

-t

, -j

-, -d

-), cordial·ness n.

cordial·ly adv.

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OFFICE BEARERS

DH3 Committee

Grand Mattress – Shagadelic
Joint Masters – Bald Eagle & Killer
Hash Hops – Cheese
Trail Master Runners – Turtle, Walkers – Koff
Hash Cash – Crow
Rigged Raffle – Flasher
Hash Lip – Lantern
Lower Lip – Turtle
Beer Bitch – Koff
Web Wanker – Shagadelic/Gone Again
Hash Texter – Shagadelic
Hash Flash – GoneAgain
Religious Advisor - GoneAgain
Hash Marriage Guidance – Black Tracka

Who needs a Hash Monk, haven't had one for years and the sun still shines...

And incidentally,....

1. HASH HOPS: This is unquestionably the most important position in the hash. The Beermeister has the weighty responsibility of making sure that the lifeblood of hashing is available at each and every hash event. He keeps constant vigilance to find the cheapest spirituous fermenti available, always has coolers in the trunk of his car, cases of beer in his garage, and reliably returns the empty keg to get another full one for the next hash. While this might be a "pain in the ass" job, it's undoubtedly the most important one to the hash.

2. GRAND MASTER: The head hasher. The chairman of the board. The big cheese. The HMFIC. The guiding light. Gispert's legacy. The GM is not simply a figure head for the hash, rather (s)he personifies the hash's character (or lack thereof.) (S)he leads with a dynamic strength that permeates the fabric of the organization. Both directly, and through the hash officers, (s)he gives inspiration, direction, and vision to all. This position ranks only below Beermeister, Hash Cash, Hash Mouth, Hash Flash, and On-Sec in real importance to the hash.

3. HASH HAWKER or HABERDASHER: This is a person who has a flair for fashion, a head for business (who said head?), and the showmanship of P.T. Barnum. (S)he's responsible for the design, procurement, warehousing, merchandising, and vending of items of apparel and various trinkets to the hash. Prior flea market or circus midway experience preferred.

4. HARE RAISER: The Hare Raiser makes sure that there's a hare (or hares) for each hash, and that the start location is known to the On-Sec well in advance of hash day for publicity purposes. The Hare Raiser IS the hare if (s)he can't find anyone else to do it.

5. HASH CASH: The holder of the purse-strings. Someone needs to dash about the start of each hash begging for money. Someone has to keep track of what comes in and what goes out (commonly referred to as "the old in and out.") These generally unappreciated duties fall on the shoulders of the Hash Cash. This trustworthy soul must withstand the whining of the Hares who have overspent, the whimpering of those who forgot their fees, and the interrogations of those who mistakenly think there should be some sort of accounting for hash funds.

6. HASH FLASH: The person who captures for posterity all embarrassing hash moments on film. The hash flash must have an acute sense of the absurd to know what to take photos of, and also a small degree of reliability to bring a camera, film, take pictures, have them developed, and put only the finest thereof into the sacred photo album.

7. HASH HARLOT: A trashy wench who has seen the dark side of hashing... and likes it! One with a lust for life who, revels in being the butt of the jester's ribald wit, the object of the songster's bawdy lyric, and the centerpiece of sensual repartee at all hash functions.

8. TRAIL MASTER or HASH HORN: Equipment requirements: A bugle or other appropriate wind instrument. Performance venue: The hash trail. Musical ability: Optional.

9. LIP : The hash mouth runs the official business at the On-On with an iron hand. (S)he must be loud, clear, passionate, articulate, humorous and possess an uncommon ability to think on his feet. It also helps if (s)he speaks English.

10. HASHIT KEEPER: This is arguably the most complicated position within the hash hierarchy. The responsibility surrounds custody of a large cardboard box (or entire house) filled with the flotsam and jetsam of past hashes. Precisely why this crap is retained is a mystery shrouded in the mythology of hashdom. However, the hashit itself rarely makes it to the hash, although the custodian is usually there himself. This reinforces the argument that remembering to bring the hashit is probably beyond the cognitive ability of your average hasher.

11. ON-SEC: This position is the masochist's dream. (S)he struggles with piles of paper, miles of computer wire, and might attempt to occasionally produce a Hound Directory or Hash Trash to keep the hash members somewhat informed. (S)he is the principal "outside" representative maintaining the Harrier.Net Worldwide WebSite, the hash membership data base. Boring stuff to say the least.

12. RELIGIOUS ADVISOR: Keeper of the faith. Enforcer of the scriptures. This is the hasher who has seen the light (Bud light) and can taste in his soul the true spirit of Hashing. The religious advisor spreads the word and inspires the zest and zeal of the hash in all participants. Any hasher found transgressing the spirit of hashing is disciplined by the RA. (S)e is the keeper of the sacred Laws of Hashing and comes up with sufficiently plausible lies to cover any serious questions of propriety of actions within the hash.

13. SONGMEISTER: This is a hasher with no self-respect. (S)he never lacks for a song suitable to the occasion. His songs are risqué, lewd, and vulgar. The Songmeister speaks with other hashers and hashes to acquire songs to add to the hash hymnal. The mission is to explore new tunes and new celebrations. To boldly go where no Songmeister has gone before (pardon the split infinitive.)

March 8, 2010

1500

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