Devonport Hash House Harriers

August 25, 2011

Adopt-a-Highway Cancelled this weekend!

There is a 95% chance of rain next Saturday, the day we are scheduled to clean our bit of highway. Tentative next date is same time but on Saturday 29 October 2011. Keep this day free!

August 22, 2011

Hash Up and Cummings 2011

(click on posters to see full size!)

Yes, you are invited to Dyke's part! RSVP now!

2pm on Saturday 27th of August. Hash Cleanup: Come to our stretch of highway at the Wattle Hill Caltex Service Station for the 2011 Adopt-a-Highway clean up.
August 22nd, Monday 6.30pm— r*n set by Crow from the Oz Rock Inn, Beach Road Ulverstone.
September 10th, 7pm - Dyke's Party at Oz Rock!
September 12th, Monday 6.30pm— LoonRhasH combined with Devonport H3 @ Molly Malone’s, Devonport.
September 17th, Saturday — Devonport Hash’s le Tour de Pisse - see poster below
October 15-16th— Burnie Hash’s Burnie Ten weekend, roll on up for the greatest slow on earth. The circus is in town….Cirque du Foleil… see flyer below. Greeat r*, hot pool, usual venue, 448 West Mooreville Road, Burnie. Campers and campervans welcome as always. Send in the Clowns...
October 29-30th—H5 Oktoberfest @ Bruny Island - see flyer below...
November 11th—combined Global Harriettes Day and LoonRhasH
November 12th, 6pm—The Hash Spring Ball, starts from the Shoreline Hotel, Howrah. Cost $60, more details to follow soon….
December 11th—Sunday LoonRhasH combined with Burnie HHH
December 18th—Burnie Hash Christmas R*n
December 19th—Devonport Hash Christmas R*n
Interhash 2012 May 22-27th, Borobudur, Jogjakarta, Indonesia!!! Rego Price increase end of August !!!
Aussie Nash Hash Brisbane, May 4-6th, 2013
Interhash July 2014 Brussels, Belgium - I’ve pledged! Think about it… Seriously!

Tour de Pisse- RSVP to flasher@dhash.com

August 17, 2011

Reminder for everyone and anyone who has ever Hashed in their life, here is your chance to redeem yourself for 2010/11: Come to our stretch of highway at the Wattle Hill Caltex Service Station for the 2011 Adopt-a-Highway clean up. Meet opposite York Street on the highway, just past Latrobe at 2pm on Saturday 27th of August. Spend a couple of hours showing off your best Hash Gear to passing motorists as you scour the ditch for roadkill and raffle prizes. We will be issued with all the necessary equipment to do our job. Be there!

August 15, 2011

City 2 Turf

A wicked wet and windy night failed to deter a hardy pack of 12 from searching for the frothing dots of self raising flour over a wide area of Devonport's least fashionable addresses. The r*nners were soon back home and into the sherbets and nibblies. The wa*kers took an hour longer to return, as they were on the same trail, probably about 8km in length and very attractive in the dark it was, too. No f*kn idea where we went, and forgot to turn on the r*nkeeper so I'll never know.
There was one lonely chip left in the bowl when we returned and no one would eat it in case it had been somewhere seriously unhygienic. Dyke soon brought out the main event and it was too hot, and then he brought out dessert, and it was too cold. Luckily the port was just right, so we drank it all up. Cheese and Dini were in charge of the rigged raffle again and made a crushing loss, and Bald Eagle won something he actually wanted. It would never have happened with Flasher in charge. Crow won the porn and was very impreessed with the twins on the front cover, I didn't have the heart to tell him there was only one. A little pack with a very big heart this evening, way too many bad jokes, a really good night.
Next week's Devonport r*n 6.30 pm Monday August 22nd is being set by Crow from the Oz Rock Inn Ulverstone. And don't forget the Burnie r*n this coming Sunday from the Penguin Golf Course starting at 3pm.
On On Dini

August 10, 2011

Go Forth and Divide

A pack of thirteen set off from the Grange on a night when the weather said "stay indoors you dumb b*stards", but Hashers never listen, do they. This was a note run for the illiterati, with Hare Killer providing photographs instead of written instructions. The first picture revealed Guardsvan's house, so off we all traipsed up that blooming jolly big hill, slopping and sloshing as the muddy water gushed by. The walking and running packs split here. Next picture for the walkers was of the Pub, and so keen were we to follow that instruction, none of us hung around to find out where the runners were off to. Dint arrived at the pub around the same time, banging on about there being no trail, so Tracka gave him instructions ("f*ck off, any direction you like"). Once inside the Pub we realised that it was almost closing time, the barmaid needed help to clear the beer lines so we applied ourselves to the task. The Sav Blanc lines were full too, apparently.

Duty done, the next picture we opened showed the shop, but most piked and headed for home. Back at the Grange the pack dived into Lucky B*tch's superb nosebag and bevies, and some of that deja vu chocolate cake. Crow poxied the lip and delivered downs with a randomness that only Fastway couriers can match. Dini and Cheese stood in for absent Flasher, raffled everything all at once, and blew the raffle budget big time. PB's beautifully twice-knitted scarf was won by Dint, it was long enough to wrap aroud his neck eight times but only long enough to go around his head once. FC made a welcome return for a cameo run, and Thrust dropped by later to see what she'd missed out on.
Next week's run is from Dyke's place, 2/64 Tugrah Road, Devonport.
On On Dini

OFFICE BEARERS

Grandmaster – Flasher Joint masters – Tracka & Tinsel Hash hops – Cheese Hash lip – Gyno Lower lip – Crow Hash cash – Bald Eagle Hash monk – Killer Rig raffle – Crow Hash Flash – Rumpole Hash web – Gone again On sec – Shagadelic Trailmasters – Maggie, Flasher Who needs a Hash Monk, haven't had one for years and the sun still shines...

And incidentally,....

1. HASH HOPS: This is unquestionably the most important position in the hash. The Beermeister has the weighty responsibility of making sure that the lifeblood of hashing is available at each and every hash event. He keeps constant vigilance to find the cheapest spirituous fermenti available, always has coolers in the trunk of his car, cases of beer in his garage, and reliably returns the empty keg to get another full one for the next hash. While this might be a "pain in the ass" job, it's undoubtedly the most important one to the hash.

2. GRAND MASTER: The head hasher. The chairman of the board. The big cheese. The HMFIC. The guiding light. Gispert's legacy. The GM is not simply a figure head for the hash, rather (s)he personifies the hash's character (or lack thereof.) (S)he leads with a dynamic strength that permeates the fabric of the organization. Both directly, and through the hash officers, (s)he gives inspiration, direction, and vision to all. This position ranks only below Beermeister, Hash Cash, Hash Mouth, Hash Flash, and On-Sec in real importance to the hash.

3. HASH HAWKER or HABERDASHER: This is a person who has a flair for fashion, a head for business (who said head?), and the showmanship of P.T. Barnum. (S)he's responsible for the design, procurement, warehousing, merchandising, and vending of items of apparel and various trinkets to the hash. Prior flea market or circus midway experience preferred.

4. HARE RAISER: The Hare Raiser makes sure that there's a hare (or hares) for each hash, and that the start location is known to the On-Sec well in advance of hash day for publicity purposes. The Hare Raiser IS the hare if (s)he can't find anyone else to do it.

5. HASH CASH: The holder of the purse-strings. Someone needs to dash about the start of each hash begging for money. Someone has to keep track of what comes in and what goes out (commonly referred to as "the old in and out.") These generally unappreciated duties fall on the shoulders of the Hash Cash. This trustworthy soul must withstand the whining of the Hares who have overspent, the whimpering of those who forgot their fees, and the interrogations of those who mistakenly think there should be some sort of accounting for hash funds.

6. HASH FLASH: The person who captures for posterity all embarrassing hash moments on film. The hash flash must have an acute sense of the absurd to know what to take photos of, and also a small degree of reliability to bring a camera, film, take pictures, have them developed and put only the finest thereof into the sacred photo album.

7. HASH HARLOT: A trashy wench who has seen the dark side of hashing... and likes it! One with a lust for life who, revels in being the butt of the jester's ribald wit, the object of the songster's bawdy lyric, and the centrepiece of sensual repartee at all hash functions.

8. TRAIL MASTER or HASH HORN: Equipment requirements: A bugle or other appropriate wind instrument. Performance venue: The hash trail. Musical ability: Optional.

9. LIP : The hash mouth runs the official business at the On-On with an iron hand. (S)he must be loud, clear, passionate, articulate, humorous and possess an uncommon ability to think on his feet. It also helps if (s)he speaks English.

10. HASHIT KEEPER: This is arguably the most complicated position within the hash hierarchy. The responsibility surrounds custody of a large cardboard box (or entire house) filled with the flotsam and jetsam of past hashes. Precisely why this crap is retained is a mystery shrouded in the mythology of hashdom. However, the hashit itself rarely makes it to the hash, although the custodian is usually there himself. This reinforces the argument that remembering to bring the hashit is probably beyond the cognitive ability of your average hasher.

11. ON-SEC: This position is the masochist's dream. (S)he struggles with piles of paper, miles of computer wire, and might attempt to occasionally produce a Hound Directory or Hash Trash to keep the hash members somewhat informed. (S)he is the principal "outside" representative maintaining the Harrier.Net Worldwide WebSite, the hash membership data base. Boring stuff to say the least.

12. RELIGIOUS ADVISOR: Keeper of the faith. Enforcer of the scriptures. This is the hasher who has seen the light (Bud light) and can taste in his soul the true spirit of Hashing. The religious advisor spreads the word and inspires the zest and zeal of the hash in all participants. Any hasher found transgressing the spirit of hashing is disciplined by the RA. (S)e is the keeper of the sacred Laws of Hashing and comes up with sufficiently plausible lies to cover any serious questions of propriety of actions within the hash.

13. SONGMEISTER: This is a hasher with no self-respect. (S)he never lacks for a song suitable to the occasion. His songs are risqué, lewd, and vulgar. The Songmeister speaks with other hashers and hashes to acquire songs to add to the hash hymnal. The mission is to explore new tunes and new celebrations. To boldly go where no Songmeister has gone before (pardon the split infinitive.)