Devonport Hash House Harriers: Fight fight fight fight!

January 2, 2015

Fight fight fight fight!

The next run is the water run from Crow's - bring your water pistol and your thinnest tee shirt for a run through the caravan parks in the near vicinity of Crow's.

Run Report from Soff:

Wow - Run 1750, that really is a significant number. And so Hashers made the journey to the hole at the end of the road - dust, sharp corners and dealing with Bastard who was driving out as Hashers were driving in. And then there was Cheeze, tailgating Soff on the exit off the highway onto Dial Road, trying to give a message. And so it was that Soff pulled up with Cheeze right behind the Patrol and Cheeze leapt out of his allegedly work van and asked if he could get a ride in the Coastal Cruisers transport as he had just washed the van. Bloody wanker!

And so a dozen or so hashers gathered at the end of the road - some remembered how Crow had attempted to cross this very hole in a cut down VW some years ago. And Crow actually had the Hub on his back - expecting to be seen by no-one, but in fact he was seen by thousands - of little leeches as we passed by on the trail. Which really went to nowhere as the Hare ran out of breath and enthusiasm on a really steep pinch and put down the HHH. But it was a great hour of walking/running in the wilderness on a great track somewhere around the back of Mt Montgomery. There were a few roots happening - or should I say trips over tree roots.

And so it was that Hashers retired back to Bastards and Pioneers place of residence for the On On. Cheeze assumed the Lip and called downs for Bald Eagle for 1380 runs, Maggie for 383 and Crow for not having odd sox. (I prefer that spelling). There was also some comment about hairy chests and in other places. Lost property was returned to it's rightful owner (me) a biro so that I could do a note or two.

After Crow's decision to wear the Hub and expecting that he would get it returned to him, the Lip, ignoring the acclamations, gave the Hub to Lantern. Still can't work that one out!

Some roast beef, chicken and other stuff filled the tummies as did the refreshments. The rafffles were won and lost and it was not a late night. And Crow was not even interested in inviting the Central Coast Cruisers back to the Oz Rock in for port - in fact he was not even interested in the port that Bastard did not offer, but was there.

On a sad note: Our thoughts are with General on the loss of his son - a result of a car crash in Canada a couple of days ago.

The next run is the water run from Crow's - bring your water pistol and your thinest tee shirt for a run through the caravan parks in the near vicinity of Crow's.

Wishing all a great new year and happy hashing in 2015!!!!

Soff

1 comment:

Ree Trebilco-Loane said...: Great pic of Calendar Girl aka "Lily" On On; January 3, 2015 at 1:23 PM

OFFICE BEARERS

Grandmaster – Flasher Joint masters – Tracka & Tinsel Hash hops – Cheese Hash lip – Gyno Lower lip – Crow Hash cash – Bald Eagle Hash monk – Killer Rig raffle – Crow Hash Flash – Rumpole Hash web – Gone again On sec – Shagadelic Trailmasters – Maggie, Flasher Who needs a Hash Monk, haven't had one for years and the sun still shines...

And incidentally,....

1. HASH HOPS: This is unquestionably the most important position in the hash. The Beermeister has the weighty responsibility of making sure that the lifeblood of hashing is available at each and every hash event. He keeps constant vigilance to find the cheapest spirituous fermenti available, always has coolers in the trunk of his car, cases of beer in his garage, and reliably returns the empty keg to get another full one for the next hash. While this might be a "pain in the ass" job, it's undoubtedly the most important one to the hash.

2. GRAND MASTER: The head hasher. The chairman of the board. The big cheese. The HMFIC. The guiding light. Gispert's legacy. The GM is not simply a figure head for the hash, rather (s)he personifies the hash's character (or lack thereof.) (S)he leads with a dynamic strength that permeates the fabric of the organization. Both directly, and through the hash officers, (s)he gives inspiration, direction, and vision to all. This position ranks only below Beermeister, Hash Cash, Hash Mouth, Hash Flash, and On-Sec in real importance to the hash.

3. HASH HAWKER or HABERDASHER: This is a person who has a flair for fashion, a head for business (who said head?), and the showmanship of P.T. Barnum. (S)he's responsible for the design, procurement, warehousing, merchandising, and vending of items of apparel and various trinkets to the hash. Prior flea market or circus midway experience preferred.

4. HARE RAISER: The Hare Raiser makes sure that there's a hare (or hares) for each hash, and that the start location is known to the On-Sec well in advance of hash day for publicity purposes. The Hare Raiser IS the hare if (s)he can't find anyone else to do it.

5. HASH CASH: The holder of the purse-strings. Someone needs to dash about the start of each hash begging for money. Someone has to keep track of what comes in and what goes out (commonly referred to as "the old in and out.") These generally unappreciated duties fall on the shoulders of the Hash Cash. This trustworthy soul must withstand the whining of the Hares who have overspent, the whimpering of those who forgot their fees, and the interrogations of those who mistakenly think there should be some sort of accounting for hash funds.

6. HASH FLASH: The person who captures for posterity all embarrassing hash moments on film. The hash flash must have an acute sense of the absurd to know what to take photos of, and also a small degree of reliability to bring a camera, film, take pictures, have them developed and put only the finest thereof into the sacred photo album.

7. HASH HARLOT: A trashy wench who has seen the dark side of hashing... and likes it! One with a lust for life who, revels in being the butt of the jester's ribald wit, the object of the songster's bawdy lyric, and the centrepiece of sensual repartee at all hash functions.

8. TRAIL MASTER or HASH HORN: Equipment requirements: A bugle or other appropriate wind instrument. Performance venue: The hash trail. Musical ability: Optional.

9. LIP : The hash mouth runs the official business at the On-On with an iron hand. (S)he must be loud, clear, passionate, articulate, humorous and possess an uncommon ability to think on his feet. It also helps if (s)he speaks English.

10. HASHIT KEEPER: This is arguably the most complicated position within the hash hierarchy. The responsibility surrounds custody of a large cardboard box (or entire house) filled with the flotsam and jetsam of past hashes. Precisely why this crap is retained is a mystery shrouded in the mythology of hashdom. However, the hashit itself rarely makes it to the hash, although the custodian is usually there himself. This reinforces the argument that remembering to bring the hashit is probably beyond the cognitive ability of your average hasher.

11. ON-SEC: This position is the masochist's dream. (S)he struggles with piles of paper, miles of computer wire, and might attempt to occasionally produce a Hound Directory or Hash Trash to keep the hash members somewhat informed. (S)he is the principal "outside" representative maintaining the Harrier.Net Worldwide WebSite, the hash membership data base. Boring stuff to say the least.

12. RELIGIOUS ADVISOR: Keeper of the faith. Enforcer of the scriptures. This is the hasher who has seen the light (Bud light) and can taste in his soul the true spirit of Hashing. The religious advisor spreads the word and inspires the zest and zeal of the hash in all participants. Any hasher found transgressing the spirit of hashing is disciplined by the RA. (S)e is the keeper of the sacred Laws of Hashing and comes up with sufficiently plausible lies to cover any serious questions of propriety of actions within the hash.

13. SONGMEISTER: This is a hasher with no self-respect. (S)he never lacks for a song suitable to the occasion. His songs are risqué, lewd, and vulgar. The Songmeister speaks with other hashers and hashes to acquire songs to add to the hash hymnal. The mission is to explore new tunes and new celebrations. To boldly go where no Songmeister has gone before (pardon the split infinitive.)

January 2, 2015

Fight fight fight fight!

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